Why My Next Car Will Have Satellite Radio

Terrestrial radio (a/k/a over-the-air radio) – especially Providence and Boston radio – you’ve done it. You’ve finally done it. You’ve lost me as a listener. Well, you will be losing me as a listener sometime in 2009, when I’ll likely be purchasing a new car. And thanks to your most-recent antics… your egregious antics – I will make sure that whichever car I purchase will have satellite radio in it.

So what’s got me so hot for satellite radio? Well, on November 6, three… yes, count ‘em: three – radio stations in the Providence and Boston markets flipped from their regular formats to the dreaded “all Christmas” format. All Christmas – on NOVEMBER 6. Two of the three stations – WWBB and WODS – are part of my daily listening routine, and the third – WROR – is also a frequent stop for me on the radio dial.

In the “old days” (read: a couple of years ago), radio stations that flipped to the dreaded “all Christmas” format would do so around Thanksgiving, ensuring a steady stream of “Jingle Bells” and “Domenic the Italian Christmas Donkey” for the month which traditionally comprised the holiday-shopping season. And while I didn’t necessarily like it, I understood it. Completely understood it. Made perfect business sense. And for one month, I could deal with it. I just would bring extra CDs in the car with me and wait it out.

But now the-powers-that-be at radio giants such as Clear Channel, CBS Radio, and Greater Media have decided that the Christmas season now begins just days after the Halloween season concludes. And hey, it’s their bat and ball, so they can play the game by their own rules… but it doesn’t mean that I have to play with them. I can go and get MY OWN bat and MY OWN ball (metaphorically, that is) and play a whole new game. And that game, my friends, is satellite radio.

You see, I really am due for a new car in 2009. And you can be quite certain that one feature that I will not do without is satellite radio. Now that local terrestrial radio has decided to devote nearly two months – that’s about 16% of its yearly schedule – to Christmas music, I need to find a permanent alternative. My CDs are great, but I love radio and its steady stream of stations. Between the stations of Providence and the stations of Boston, I’d pretty much found most of what’d been looking for in radio. But what I’m NOT looking for is nearly two months per year worth of “O Holy Night.” Thanks, but no thanks.

Oh, and did forget to mention that another station – WWLI , part of the Citadel cluster in Providence – flipped to “all Christmas” today? WWLI had been scheduled to flip to "all Christmas" on November 17, but due to its cross-town rival WWBB flipping last week, WWLI felt that it had to move up its plan by one week, rather than cede the early "all Christmas" lead to its opponent. Lucky us. Anyway... for those of you keeping score at home, that brings the total of "all-Christmas" radio stations in Providence and Boston to FOUR. And if you do the math, then you’ll find that four more than we need.

For this year, I’m stuck with local terrestrial radio… thus ensuring that no matter what Burl Ives may try to tell my on these four stations, it will NOT be a holly and jolly season. Bah, humbug. However, by this time next year, it may be one long, silent night for the Providence and Boston radio stations… well, in MY car, anyway.