Monday, April 21, 2008

Leaky 'Roof'

Ladies and gentlemen, I have seen what may just be television’s worst situation comedy – ever. Yes, EVER. Worse than Flo… worse than According to Jim… worse than AfterMASH, and yes, ever worse than Cavemen. This little gem of a show about which I’m writing is none other than Under One Roof, My Network TV’s first-ever stab at a scripted comedy. The word “stab” may be an especially-appropriate usage in this particular case, as MNT should kill this atrocity immediately.

Going into the debut of Under One Roof, my hope was for a half-hour of “so bad it’s good” (SBIG) television, as Roof features Flavor Flav, one of the charter members of the “so bad it’s good” hall of fame (for anyone who’s not familiar with Flav’s particular brand of SBIG television, I will simply point you in the direction of VH1, where his Flavor of Love 3 runs about 5 times a day). Unfortunately, Roof is SO bad that it’s BAD. Just plain bad. Painfully, excruciatingly bad.

To start with, the pilot of Roof committed the egregious television sin of failing to establish the premise of the show. This is what EVERY first episode MUST do! The premise of Roof is that Flav’s character Calvester is an recently-released-from-prison ex-con who moves in with his wealthy, conservative brother and his brother’s snobby wife… and this move leads to all sorts of culture clashes. Oh, you're laughing already, aren't you? What... you're not? Anyway... if this premise sounds like a page out of the fish-out-of-water playbook of The Fresh Prince of Bel Air, then that’s because IT IS! Sadly, the pilot did NOTHING to establish this premise. When the show opens, Calvester is already living with his brother and is apparently assimilated into his brother and sister-in-law’s world. Huh? Did I miss something? Apparently I did. I obviously missed something FUNNY.

But wait, there’s more! Roof includes a housekeeper character… and sadly, this character is a throwback to every negative Asian stereotype ever presented in the history of television or film. Apparently, someone at MNT longs for the days of old Charlie Chan movies and Calgon commercials.

Also, please note that Roof’s acting and writing was about as bad as you’re ever likely to witness on television (stick to reality TV, Flav – I beg of you!). Yes, I do remember The Golden Palace on CBS… and yes, the acting and writing on Roof is even worse than that!

This Roof has so many leaks in it that the entire house needs to be torn down. Start tearing, MNT... start tearing.


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IMPORTANT PROGRAM NOTE

Effective this Thursday, NBC will swap the time slots of 30 Rock and Scrubs. Scrubs will now air at 8:30, and 30 Rock will move to 9:30. And while we’re on the subject of Thursday nights (my own personal must-see-TV night), don’t forget that Lost will move to 10:00 effective this Thursday night.

Needless to say, I will not be answering the phone after 9:30 on Thursdays.

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