Living The Surreal Life
The year 2005 continues to be for me an exercise in surreal adventures. Some of you are already familiar with my surreal exploits: the Billy Gilman concert in Westerly, the trip around the Colossal Colon, "the party," meeting "Mr. Burns," and the Public Access Awards, just to name a few. Well, I'm semi-proud to announce that I have another surreal tale to add to this ever-growing list: I attended a Hanson concert. Yes, that Hanson; the Hanson that gave the world the sugar-coated, sickeningly-sweet pop pseudo-classic MMMBop.
Now, your first question may be... WHY??? To answer your question... please know that I'm not a Hanson fan; however, one of my very favorite people in the world is a fan, and she needed someone to attend the show with her. And being that my fondness for her runs so deep that I really would do just about anything for her, volunteer I did.
You know, someday I've reeeeeealy going to have to learn to stop raising my hands for these kind of assignments. But I digress.
The concert was held last Friday night in Boston, at the club Avalon on Lansdowne Street. Prior to getting to the club, however, my friend and I spent some time roaming the city, and this roaming included a stop at the Prudential Center, a highly-successful urban mall situated in-between Boylston Street and Huntington Avenue (footnote for Krispy Kreme lovers: be warned that the Krispy Kreme store in the Pru has closed. Oh, the pain).
What made this mall stop noteworthy was the surrealistically unexpected, unanticipated encounter with the Xcelerator, the world's most powerful hand dryer. Actually, the word "powerful" doesn't quite do justice to this device. Seriously, with enough power to potentially tear the skin right off of your hands, I wouldn't at all be surprised if this thing was used by NASA to simulate wind force during trial runs of the Space Shuttle. And loud? If you've ever heard a 727 take off from TF Green Airport, then you have a pretty good idea of the decibel level generated by this air-spewing monster.
Anyway, back to the concert. Stupid me - I had anticipated that the whole thing would be pretty harmless; "after all," I thought to myself, "it's only those Hanson boys - how many people could they possibly draw?"
Quite a few, as it turned out. The place was PACKED with rabid, screaming Hanson fans. And judging from the number of people assembled into this place, the line to get in the door must have started early, and it likely had stretched around Fenway Park (Avalon's neighbor). The zealous fans, who sang along with every lyric and Pavlovianly waved their hands each and every time one of the Hansons instructed them to, seemed to be more than pleased with the show. Their screams, though, at times were so vociferous that they often drowned out the music... which, now that I think about it, maybe wasn't such a bad thing.
I simply stared in amazement at the sociological experiment which surrounded me... and at that moment I came to the realization that yet another surreal moment was upon me.
And so, there you have it. Me. At a Hanson concert. Who would've thought? What's next... me watching UPN? Nah, that could never happen... right?
No, Dear
FINALLY -- after several excrutiating years and a couple of last minute reprieves from the CBS programming version of a governor -- it looks as if CBS is once-and-for-all pulling the plug on Yes, Dear. This lame-excuse-for-a-comedy sitcom just may have finally used up its ninth life. The Eye has passed on ordering the back-nine episodes for this season, which means that Yes, Dear will cease production after its 13th episode. Yes, television lovers: it's time to pop open that bottle of cancellation champagne!
I mean, come on -- with the possible exception of Still Standing, has there been a less-funny sitcom on CBS' prime time schedule over the past couple of years? The plug should have been pulled on this baby years ago. Goodbye, Dear.
Now, your first question may be... WHY??? To answer your question... please know that I'm not a Hanson fan; however, one of my very favorite people in the world is a fan, and she needed someone to attend the show with her. And being that my fondness for her runs so deep that I really would do just about anything for her, volunteer I did.
You know, someday I've reeeeeealy going to have to learn to stop raising my hands for these kind of assignments. But I digress.
The concert was held last Friday night in Boston, at the club Avalon on Lansdowne Street. Prior to getting to the club, however, my friend and I spent some time roaming the city, and this roaming included a stop at the Prudential Center, a highly-successful urban mall situated in-between Boylston Street and Huntington Avenue (footnote for Krispy Kreme lovers: be warned that the Krispy Kreme store in the Pru has closed. Oh, the pain).
What made this mall stop noteworthy was the surrealistically unexpected, unanticipated encounter with the Xcelerator, the world's most powerful hand dryer. Actually, the word "powerful" doesn't quite do justice to this device. Seriously, with enough power to potentially tear the skin right off of your hands, I wouldn't at all be surprised if this thing was used by NASA to simulate wind force during trial runs of the Space Shuttle. And loud? If you've ever heard a 727 take off from TF Green Airport, then you have a pretty good idea of the decibel level generated by this air-spewing monster.
Anyway, back to the concert. Stupid me - I had anticipated that the whole thing would be pretty harmless; "after all," I thought to myself, "it's only those Hanson boys - how many people could they possibly draw?"
Quite a few, as it turned out. The place was PACKED with rabid, screaming Hanson fans. And judging from the number of people assembled into this place, the line to get in the door must have started early, and it likely had stretched around Fenway Park (Avalon's neighbor). The zealous fans, who sang along with every lyric and Pavlovianly waved their hands each and every time one of the Hansons instructed them to, seemed to be more than pleased with the show. Their screams, though, at times were so vociferous that they often drowned out the music... which, now that I think about it, maybe wasn't such a bad thing.
I simply stared in amazement at the sociological experiment which surrounded me... and at that moment I came to the realization that yet another surreal moment was upon me.
And so, there you have it. Me. At a Hanson concert. Who would've thought? What's next... me watching UPN? Nah, that could never happen... right?
** ** **
No, Dear
FINALLY -- after several excrutiating years and a couple of last minute reprieves from the CBS programming version of a governor -- it looks as if CBS is once-and-for-all pulling the plug on Yes, Dear. This lame-excuse-for-a-comedy sitcom just may have finally used up its ninth life. The Eye has passed on ordering the back-nine episodes for this season, which means that Yes, Dear will cease production after its 13th episode. Yes, television lovers: it's time to pop open that bottle of cancellation champagne!
I mean, come on -- with the possible exception of Still Standing, has there been a less-funny sitcom on CBS' prime time schedule over the past couple of years? The plug should have been pulled on this baby years ago. Goodbye, Dear.
posted by TV Boy at 6:47 PM
1 Comments:
While it's true that you did not participate in the hand-waving portion of the show, the hand and finger "spinning" that you were doing during the performance of the Round and Round song certainly would have qualified as a conditioned response as defined by Dr. Pavlov.
As for your commment about Taylor... perhaps you meant to write "Taylor is an ass"...? That would seem to be an apt description of the lad.
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